In Defense of Marriage

Q: Someone asked me why Christians want to make homosexual marriage illegal but aren't trying to make marriage between Christians and non-Christians illegal. He said that since the Bible is against both types of marriages and Christians only focus on homosexual marriage, it is obvious that they are doing this only out of prejudice against gay people. What is a good answer to this?

A: I don't accept the premise of the question. Christians are not trying to make homosexual marriage illegal. Christians are trying keep the legal definition of marriage as the union of a man and woman as husband and wife. In fact, the term "homosexual marriage" is a contradiction in terms. Since the individual who asked you the question is using the Bible as their standard then we are free to turn to the pages of Scripture to disprove their reasoning. "The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man." For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh (Genesis 2:23-24)." It is clear that man becomes united with woman in marriage. Furthermore, the Bible's thoughts on homosexuality are clear. "Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable (Leviticus 18:22)." Therefore, to equate a detestable sex act between two individuals of the same sex with marriage, designated for the union between a man and woman, is not supported by the Bible.

In 2 Corinthians 6:14 we read, "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?" If the individual who asked you this question knew anything about Christian doctrine they would know that this passage is a common sense directive to Christians not to have close fellowship or ties with unbelievers. This is because a Christian and a non-Christian do not have anything in common at their core. A believer is righteous and spiritually alive to God. Whereas an unbeliever is wicked and spiritually dead to God in sin. However, we still have to have some contact with unbelievers in order to be a witness to them for the Lord. Normally, if you are in fellowship with an unbeliever, especially if you marry one, it is kind of difficult to tell them they need salvation in Christ when you are probably engaging in similar activities or agreeing with them in much of what they believe. However, there is more the Bible says about marrying an unbeliever.

Christians, because of their freedom in Christ, are allowed to marry unbelievers. However, they can't blame God if their marriage suffers because of the fundamental differences that will no doubt arise. But, we must remember that marriage is the union between man and woman. There is no designation that only two Christians can get married. The Apostle Paul even had something to say about a Christian and non-Christian being married. " If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him (1 Corinthians 7:12-13)." One could easily make the argument that the sin would be to divorce your spouse because of their unbelief, especially if they are comfortable with your faith. That flies in the face of someone saying that the "Bible is against both types of marriages." Not only is there no such thing as homosexual marriage, the Bible doesn't condemn the marriage between a believer and an unbeliever. The issue is not one of Christian prejudice towards homosexuals, it is one of Christians standing for the true definition of marriage and not compromising it in order to condone sexual sin.

I doubt whether the person who asked you this question is really interested in the truth. Most likely they are more interested in trying to plant a seed of doubt in your faith by what they presume to be a contradiction in the scriptures, or at the very least, a hypocritical stance by Christians towards homosexual marriage. The Bible says that people like this "are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts (Ephesians 4:18)." In other words, they don't know the truth because they are lost. They don't know Jesus Christ as their Savior. Next time someone asks you a similar question like this ask them what evidence they are willing to accept to be persuaded of the biblical view of marriage? Their response will let you know whether they are seeking the truth or just an opportunity to argue. We are told to avoid "godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly (2 Timothy 2:16)." Homosexuality is a sin and marriage is not sinful. "Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate (Mark 10:9)." Be blessed.