You Belong to God

Q: I am not sure if this is the right place to ask but I have to ask someone. Lately I have stopped going to church because I feel like I don't belong there. I also am afraid to read the Bible because something bad always happens to me when I do. I really don't know what to do. I am worried I will be going to hell cause I don't like going to church. And i question rather God knows wants to help me or if there is a reason why my life is how it is.

A: Thank you for reaching out to get some answers. Your situation is not unique and is to be expected given what passes for the average church experience. I don't know what you mean by not feeling like you belong at church. However, it is understandable because there are many churches that simply put an unbearable burden on their congregation. That burden is constantly being told that you have to live an impossible lifestyle of being sinless in order to be blessed by God or accepted by Him. . You soon realize that you are incapable of ever being able to live this life. The result is feeling that God, and at the very least your fellow churchmen, are disappointed in you. This why you feel you will be going to Hell. After all, how could a loving God love someone who can't live up to His standards? Let me tell you something. God doesn't expect you to live up to His standards. And that is exactly how He wants it to be.

In order for you to try and live a sinless and perfect life, you have to subject yourself to some form of law. And the ultimate form of the law is the Mosaic Law of God. But, we have to realize what was the purpose of God giving His Law. "So the law was put in charge to lead us to Christ that we might be justified by faith (Galatians 3:24)." The Law, any law for that matter, is to show you your sinfulness so that you will turn to Christ for salvation. Furthermore, if you are saved, the Law has no purpose in your life. It is not there to show you how to live your life as a Christian. A Christian lives by faith in the indwelling Holy Spirit of God to guide them from within. It is the grace of God that "teaches us to say "No" to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age (Titus 2:12)." It is God's grace, a constant reminder of who you are in Christ and His love for you, that guides you. When you are receiving God's love for you, you will then treat others the way God treats you. And when you are serving others in love you will not be sinning against them. And love is the fulfillment of the Law. "Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law (Romans 13:10)."

If you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Savior, then your salvation is completely secure and you have eternal life. Those sins you are trying to avoid in order for God to accept you are not even being counted against you. 2 Corinthians 5:19 says, "God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation." If God is not counting your sins against you, what sin is separating you from Him? The answer is "no sin" is coming between you and God. It has to be that way or the life that He restored to you at salvation, the resurrected life of Jesus Christ, would have to leave. But, if we could lose His life, then it is no longer eternal life. "I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life (1 John 5:13)." If you have Jesus Christ you have eternal life. Therefore, God is not entering your life and causing bad things to happen to you. Those bad things that are happening are just a sad fact of living in a sinful world. The circumstances of your life are not a reflection of how God feels about you. Rather, use those circumstances to discover what it is you can learn about God and how He sees you in the midst of them.

When I first got saved, I went through a period where I did not attend church for a few years. I could not find a church that was teaching the grace of God. Any church that teaches you that you must stop sinning is only trying to control you. They need you feeling the way you do in order to keep you coming back hoping that someday you will figure it out. In the meantime you are milked of your time, treasure and talent that only benefits the leaders of the church. All that results is that you either live a defeated life thinking God will never love you. Or, you deceive yourself into believing you are being obedient to God's Law. One is condemnation and the other is religious pride. Both are not of God. The Bible teaches that there is "no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1)." So, any condemnation you feel is not from God. Furthermore, "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble (James 4:6)." Therefore, pride is also not coming from God. God wants you to be thankful for His grace and mercy. It is realizing that you cannot live up to His standards and need His grace and mercy that makes you thankful that you have it because of your faith in what Jesus Christ accomplished for you.

I would encourage you to find alternative forms of fellowship. I would guess part of your struggle is that you believe that Christians are required to go to church. Yet, you are concerned with trying to reconcile going to a church you feel you don't belong at with God's supposed requirement for you to be there in attendance. The Bible says, "Let us not give up meeting together (Hebrews 10:25)." Meeting together can be accomplished in many different ways. I found it through the Internet when I didn't have a local fellowship to attend. It can be done in homes, libraries, coffee shops, etc. The church setting is the most common form of meeting together, but not the only form. Seek these alternative forms out or start your own study. Jesus said, "For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them (Matthew 18:20)." Two or three people hardly can be considered a church. Besides, even if you are alone, God is with you because He indwells you. I hope these words have encouraged you to understand that while you may not feel like you belong at church, you still belong to the Lord. Be blessed.