“Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But deceitful are the kisses of an enemy (Proverbs 27:6).” The truth hurts! Tough love! These are things that we may give to others, but would not want to be the recipient of them. I remember years ago when I was suffering from a broken heart, one of my best friends told me, “It is going to hurt for a long time and not get much better.” He was telling me this because of his own experience and difficulty getting past his pain. It is exactly what I needed to hear. When we are hurting, we want our friends to tell us how wrong it is that we are hurting, how it is the loss of the other person for us no longer being in their live, and how our pain is only temporary. However, often times these words are meaningless and do not help our situations because they don’t address the reality of the situation. They are only said with the intent of pumping up our pride and ego. However, true friends will tell you what you need to hear and not what you want to hear. True friends may even say things that increase the pain. However, the only way to get through a situation is to be honest about what is causing the pain. The truth test of friendship is when a friend is willing to say the things that not only test the friendship, but may even risking ending it. Their actions are really a show of love and support for the one hurting. I am thankful for what my friend told me those many years ago. It prepared me for what was to come instead of giving me a false sense of reality because it temporarily made me feel good. There is also the concern that those who tell you what you want to hear are setting you up for a fall because they are really not your friends. Just remember that love doesn't always feel good, but is meant for the good. And those that deliver that kind of love are most likely your real friends.
Suffering in Silence
It is interesting how when a public figure is facing a crisis of any kind people will make sure that the whole world stops and takes notice as if their life is more important than the average citizen. But, where is the national spotlight when our individual crises happen? For instance, I get a call that my best friend’s father suffered a stroke and is near death. Another friend’s wife is “back in the hospital after having a bad reaction to one of her meds.” My own father nearly missed Christmas because of his own stay in the hospital. Christmas Season just passed. With its focus on love, family and “good will toward men,” it is also a time that many people feel depressed.
If you are struggling at this time of year, it can easily be a time when a person feels alone and not loved. When others appear to have what you do not and are getting all the attention, where do you turn? “I look up to the mountains—does my help come from there? My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth! He will not let you stumble; the one who watches over you will not slumber. Indeed, he who watches over Israel never slumbers or sleeps. The LORD himself watches over you! The LORD stands beside you as your protective shade. The sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon at night. The LORD keeps you from all harm and watches over your life. The LORD keeps watch over you as you come and go, both now and forever (Psalm 121).” As Christians, we can take heart in the fact that if the Lord watched over Israel, He is watching over you because of your faith in Jesus Christ. So, if you are facing a crisis and feeling alone, ignored or helpless, take heart in the fact that your God is watching over you, standing beside you, protecting you and helping you. That truth may not change your circumstances, but will help you through them.
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