"Such regulations indeed have an appearance of wisdom, with their self-imposed worship, their false humility and their harsh treatment of the body, but they lack any value in restraining sensual indulgence." Colossians 2:23
A relative of mine suggested that I read the book, "Every Man's Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory at a Time." Now, I don't know why it was suggested to me. I didn't confide in them that I was "losing the battle" with sexual temptation nor were we even discussing the subject. The description of the book reads, "From movies and television, to print media and the Internet, men are constantly faced with the assault of sensual images. It is impossible to avoid such temptations... but, thankfully, not impossible to confront them and gain victory over them!" That about sums it up when it comes to all the fronts where men are confronted with sexual temptation. The devastation that sexual sin has caused to individuals and relationships is endless. From fornication to adultery and from pornography to sexual deviancy, the temptation of sexual sin knows no boundaries. Christians and unbelievers are both familiar with the story in the Bible about Sodom and Gomorrah and the wrath of God which befell those cities due to their descent into sexual immorality. "Then the Lord rained down burning sulfur on Sodom and Gomorrah—from the Lord out of the heavens. Thus he overthrew those cities and the entire plain, destroying all those living in the cities—and also the vegetation in the land (Genesis 19:24-25)." It is because of stories like this and the struggle men have with sexual sin that books like the one suggested to me to read are written so frequently. For clarity, I did not read the book and do not have any intention to read it. Not that the book doesn't have any useful information, but that this subject is not new to me and I don't feel that the answer to gaining "victory" over sexual sin, or sin in general, is ultimately found in instituting different techniques to modify your behavior. No offense is meant towards the author of the book, the person who suggested I read it, or to those that may have benefited from reading it. It is that I believe the more you focus on a particular sin, the more that sin gets a foothold on you than it may already have presently. Do not get me wrong, I have committed sexual sin and am not proud of it. And, yes, like the book talks about, sexual temptation is impossible to avoid. However, there is something that I know about my faith in Jesus Christ that helps me in this area as well as other areas of sin that tempt me. The Bible says, "The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law (1 Corinthians 15:56)." The power of sin is the law. In other words, the techniques you submit to that are designed to help you in "winning the war on sexual temptation" will only lead to the discovery of more sins to avoid. Then this "battle" becomes your life. The Apostle Paul, who wrote the verse from 1 Corinthians also said, "But sin, seizing the opportunity afforded by the commandment, produced in me every kind of coveting (Romans 7:8)," when he talked about the law commanding him not to covet. It did not give him victory it only produced more enemies to fight!
I have seen it all when it comes to avoiding sexual temptation. Make a "covenant" with your eyes as a promise not to look at something tempting. Put your personal computer in an open space in your home so as to be accountable to other people in the home. Get all types of filtering software for your computer to help you avoid inappropriate internet websites. Become a member of an "accountability" group where the pressure of having to give an account of your activities to others will hopefully get you to not give in to temptation. While all of these things may have their merit and work to some degree, where is Jesus in all of this? Every "covenant" you make, computer software that you install, placement of the furniture in the home, or group you belong to, as the verse from Colossians 2 says, will not have any value in restraining sensual indulgence. The entire focus of your Christian life becomes you and your attempts to avoid sexual temptation and not Jesus Christ and how He overcame sin on your behalf. There is no question we should do our best to avoid sin, sexual or otherwise. However, I hope the motivation isn't solely because sin is wrong and should be avoided, but rather that you are resting in the love and acceptance of God through your faith in Jesus Christ and as a byproduct the appeal of sin is diminishing. Furthermore, when you do sin, and you will whether it is sexual or otherwise, the forgiveness of God prevents that sin from separating you from Him. Therefore, you can go to Him for comfort, love, and guidance with the hope that He will instruct you in ways to live above your circumstances. Remember, "But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ (1 Corinthians 15:57)." The power of sin is the law, but the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ have given us the victory over sin. One area that you often see "every man's battle" play out is in the area of dating. If you have a committed relationship between a man and woman, the struggle can be "how do you get close to one another without getting 'too' close?" if you catch my meaning. Again, you can try to implement the many techniques written about in various books on how to date without giving in to sexual temptation. While those may work and have worked, there is a better way to live. What does God say? "But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion (1 Corinthians 7:9)." The advice God gives the unmarried is to simply get married. Rather than a couple trying not to give in to sexual temptation and frustrating themselves constantly, they are told to just get married. There are no techniques given, just eliminate the temptation to fall in to sin altogether. There is no need to try and win a battle when God has already given you the means to avoid the conflict in the first place. In Christ, you have won the battle!
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