Frankly, My Dear...

Gone with the Wind is a 1939 movie starring Clark Gable and Vivien Leigh. The movie is a romance set around the time of the Civil War in the 1860s. At the time, the film won an unprecedented 10 Academy Awards. A record that stood for nearly 20 years. One of the classic lines in the film comes when Gable's character, Rhett Butler, rebukes Leigh's character, Scarlett O'Hara, with the classic line, "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn!" Basically, what he said to her was that he did not care what she thought. Unfortunately, while many of us admire the individuality of "Rhett Butler," and say that we do not care what others think about us, deep down, we do care what others think about us. I talked the other day about how this desire to be loved and accepted by others can lead to us compromising all that we hold dear. Rush Limbaugh, radio talk show host, said the following on this subject.

"We have a national psychosis problem: way too many people give a damn what people think of us in these various hellholes that harbor people who want to kill us. They give a damn what people think of them individually, too -- and I'm telling you, that's death. That's destructive. It stunts your growth."

I think Limbaugh hits the nail on the head when he talks about how worrying about what other people think of us is destructive and stunts our growth. We all love a pat on the back, being part of the in-crowd and the comfort that can come from being a part of a group. I have heard it said that each one of us is the sum of the five people closest to us. Well, that would make sense because we don't often spend time with those people we don't have anything in common with. However, there could always come a time when following the crowd can be to our detriment.

"You were running a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth? That kind of persuasion does not come from the one who calls you. "A little yeast works through the whole batch of dough." I am confident in the Lord that you will take no other view. The one who is throwing you into confusion will pay the penalty, whoever he may be. Brothers, if I am still preaching circumcision, why am I still being persecuted? In that case the offense of the cross has been abolished. As for those agitators, I wish they would go the whole way and emasculate themselves!" Galatians 5:7-12

Do you remember, growing up, being asked, "If your friends jumped off a cliff would you follow them?" This was usually a rhetorical question asked of us by an upset parent after we blindly followed others into trouble. Normally, we would, sheepishly, respond, "No." Although, the chances of us repeating our actions were probably quite high. Most of us would probably jump off the, proverbial, cliff with our friends because we cared about what they thought of us. Even when we do know better we will still go along with the crowd because we fear not doing so would lead to being ostracized by the group. There have been times in my life that I kept quiet or went along with the crowd because I didn't have the heart to stand up against those that I spent my time with. I remember being invited to, and attending, the bachelor party of my best friend. I was a Christian at the time, and obviously still very worldly. Despite knowing that a bachelor party was not an activity a Christian should participate in, I went anyway. I put my friends feelings ahead of my better judgment. To this day I am haunted by my behavior at this party. I can still hear a friend of mine shouting, "You're not a Christian!" after my participation in the activities. I was a Christian, but certainly was not acting consistent with my identity in Christ. I let the influence of friends, and the lure of flesh, "cut in" on me and keep me from obeying the truth. My one transgression was like the yeast that destroys the dough. Thankfully, I am forgiven and God has used that incident to build me up and strengthen me.

"We have much to say about this, but it is hard to explain because you are slow to learn. In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God's word all over again. You need milk, not solid food! Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil." Hebrews 5:11-14

The Bible tells us you can't serve two masters. To do so makes us unstable in all ways. Is not that what happens when we care about others opinion of us? As Christians, we know better. Yet, despite knowing better, we still do the things that take away from opportunities to grow and mature in the faith. There comes a time in every Christian's life that we wish we had the "answer" to a problem we encounter. We pray to God for a magical response to it. Often, that doesn't come. When Jesus was in the wilderness, being tempted by the devil, His response to every temptation of the devil was to quote scripture to him. The devil eventually fled from Him. We should be the same. But, we cannot do the same if we don't get in the Word. And normally, we don't have a familiarity with the Word to rely on because we were involved in activities designed to please others. Thus, our growth is stunted and we don't have the truths of scripture to rely on when we encounter a problem in our lives. If you have a child and he or she says "ga ga goo goo" you don't mind it because you know that is the extent of their maturity. However, if that child is now 35 years old and still saying "ga ga goo goo" you would be concerned. Many believers have been in the faith for years, but still have the maturity of a newborn Christian. Thus, they not only have stunted their growth, left themselves unprepared to handle life's problems, but they cannot teach others. You cannot pass along what you don't know! So, if you want to mature in your faith, be a teacher and not an infant, and be prepared for life's problems, take lesson from "Rhett Butler" and, excuse my language, not give a damn about what others think about you. Amen!